John and I woke up this morning from a pretty good nights sleep for once because of the pain pills mixed with sleeping pills for both of us. We ran some errands needed to go to both banks and then we had extra time before meeting with the funeral director so I asked him to drive me thru the park and that I love and hadn't seen in months. It was really pretty and the smiling happy people didn't bother me to much. I looked at the world thru the windows and saw it was still turning. People were smiling laughing having picnics and playing on playgrounds, walking dogs and feeding squirrels. Don't they know the world stopped turning just over 72 hours ago? The sun was out when it should be dark and raining. When we were on our way to the funeral home there was a small town parade going on. Everyone was happy and I was dieing on the inside. We pulled up and my father and step mother met us there for support. We walked in the funeral room to smiling faces and of course people saying how sorry they were. We went back to a conference room with big chairs and a table in the middle. We all sat down and begun to plan out our daughters final orders. I brought her a little outfit to wear even though we are getting her cremated with no viewing. No one was going to see her like that and we certaintly not going to let anyone touch her little body. They were nice and promised to dress her. We picked out a small baby urn that was a pink metal box and had some custom graphics put on it a little angel with butterflies around her. Special words and sayings engraved in it along with her name and information. This whole thing though sounds easy but was not. Each choice was hard and final. Still hasn't rang in that she is gone. We also ran a obituary in one of the local smaller papers. Here is the link to the paper online it should run in tomorrow's paper.
Thank you all again for your support I am sorry we still are not talking to people we just need more time. I will continue to try to blog as much as I can.